Being Impatient

Oh, Wow. I Still Can't Believe I'm Still Like This After All This Time. But, I'm A Very Impatient Person. I Hate It. But, Sometimes I Love It To Cuz Then People Know That I'm Not Bullshitting When I Want Something. I Hate Fucking Waiting On Shit. It's Just That When I Want Something I Want It Right Then And There. Same Thing When It Comes To Men. If I Want A Man To Be A Certain Way Or To Change. Something Like That I Get Very Impatient With All That Shit And Move On To Something Else. It's Just Strange That I Still Have That In Me. I've Been This Way Since I Was 16. That's When It Started Creeping In. People Say That It's Being Bitchy Cuz Of How I Say It. But, I Say Things When I'm Impatient In Mean Ways Cuz It's Funny And I'm Kidding At Times With It Also. Yall Know By Now That I'm A Very Abrassive Woman. And I Feel That I Want Or Deserve Certain Things In Life. And Well That I Should Feel Like That. And I Think In A Way That Every Woman Feels The Exact Same Way That I Do. Shit, I Derseve The Best. And Don't Take This The Wrong Way. But, I Don't Mean In A Materialistic Way When I Say That. Cuz, I Don't Care About Material Things Cuz That Shit Comes And Goes. Just Don't Give A Fuck About All That. But Anyway, I Just Think That People Can't Tell When I'm Joking Around, Or Being Serious. Sometimes It's Funny To See The Looks On People's Faces Cuz They Can't Tell. But, Then I Bust Out Laughing. Then They Know That I'm Kidding. I Wish That I Wasn't Like That Cuz I Know That Now That I'm On My Grown Woman About It. There's No Need To Be Impatient About Anything In Life. Cuz, Eventually I Know I'm Gonna Get What I Want And Get My Way Anyway. But, Yall Already Know That I'm Just Irresitable Like That. LOL. But, You Gotta Love Me Though.

Hurt Beyond Measure

Shit, I Thought That Today Was Gonna Be A Different Day. But, I Guess I Was Wrong. Got My About To Be 4 Year Old Son's Pictures Today When I Got To See My Babies. And Later On After I Got To Spend Time With Them Cuz Mother's Day Is Coming Up This Weekend And All That. We Go Out And Meet Up With His Friend And All That Good Shit. And We Got Back To My House. And I Said That I Wanted To Get Something To Eat To Feel Better That I Had To Either Sleep With Him, Or Give Him Oral Sex. I'm Not That Type Of Bitch. He Got The Wrong One On That Shit There. I'm More Than Just A Quick Fuck, Or Some Shit. To Me I Mean More Than That. I'm Sorry But This Is Bullshit. If We Get Divorced I Wouldn't Give A Fuck Cuz To Me I Don't Mean Shit To Him. And It's Time To Hang It Up. I Have His Kids For God Sake, And He Has No More Respect For Me Than That. Shit, I'm Better Off On My Own. Like I Said I Need A "Real Man" In My Life. Cuz, This Is Crazy. I Know I Ain't All That But Shit I'm Better Than He's Making Me Out To Be. It Hurts Cuz I've Invested 11 Years Into This. And It Seems Like He Don't Care. But, I Got My Sons And That's All I Care About. And As Far As Him I Don't Care. He's Just My Baby Daddy And I Don't Give A Fuck. I Had 3 Cranberry And Vodkas And I Feel Pretty Good Right Now. I Really Don't Care At This Point Cuz I'm Glad I'm Alone Cuz Men Ain't Shit. Why I'm Crying Over This Shit I Don't Know. Cuz, To Tell You The Truth I Don't Give A Shit. It's Gonna Get To The Point Where I'm Not Gonna Be Able To Be Friends With Him. I Can't Wait Til Our Divorce Is Final Cuz He's Such A Piece Of Shit. Shit, I'm Done With Him I Can Do Better. Fuck It!

This Is Just Wrong...

Shit, Right Now I'm So Fucking Pissed Off And Emotionally Mad It's Not Even Funny. I Found Out That Someone I Know That's A Female Damn Near Got Beat To Death By Her Fucking Boyfriend. This Is So Crazy Cuz Us As Women Don't Need To Be Treated This Way. It's Ridiculous How Bad It Is. I Barely Can Type Or Talk About This Right Now. I Hope She Presses Charges On Him. Cuz, He's A Piece Of Shit That Needs To Rot In Hell With Gasoline Draws On. Shit, He's Got A Spot Already Waiting On Him Anyway. And What Scares Me Is That She Says, "She Loves Him". Oh No, She Can't Be Serious. He Beat Her Like She Was A Fucking Man. Let Me Get My Hands On That Asshole I'll Show Him Who The Real Nigga Is, And Who The Real Bitch Is. And I'm Telling You Now That The Bitch Ain't Me. I Can't Stop Crying Cuz I've Been There And There's NO EXCUSE For What He Did. None At All. I Feel So Bad For Her Cuz I Feel Like She's Just Gonna Have Him Locked Up Cuz She's Just Upset Right Now. And Then When She Calms Down Drop The Charges And Let Him Out So He Can Do It Again. And Shit, He's Gonna Do Worse If She Doesn't Do Something About It. They Got Into An Arguemnet Which I Understand. But It Didn't Have To Go That Far Though. And From What I Know They Are Gonna Keep Her At The Hospital. If She Doesn't Press Charges At Least Put A Restraining Order On Him To Keep Him From Her. With All This Going On It Makes Me Fear To Be In A Relationship. If That's What Females Think Love Is. Ladies, If A Man Hits Or Beats You Get Out Now. A Man Doesn't Love You If He Puts His Hands On You. I Don't Care What Anybody Says. And If You Think That's What Love Is Shit, You Have Major Fucking Issues. Cuz, Ladies We All Know Better Shit Than That. Don't We?

Idea Of Love

Why Is It That I Always Look At Other People's Relationships And Feel Jealous? Is It Cuz I Want The Same Thing? Or Am I Just Mad That I'm Alone? Then Again It May Be All Of The Above. Some People Say That I Love The Idea Of Being In Love That's How Come I Get Hurt So Easily. It's Just That I Love Affection, Being Under My Man, Playfully Being With Him, And Talking Seductively To Him. Letting Him Know That I Love Attention, And That He's Also The Center Of My Attention As Well. But, I Can't Understand Why Guys Don't Appreciate Those Types Of Things. I Know Yall Are Gonna Think This Is Strange. But, I Would Rather Be Under My Man, Cuddling Up With Him Than Have Sex. Don't Get Me Wrong, I Love Sex It's Just That's Not The Only Damn Thing That I Want To Do When I Get With My Man. Spending Quality Time Without Fucking Is A Good Thing. I Can't Even Find Guys That Even Love Kissing, And Holding Hands Anymore Without It Leading To The Bedroom. I Don't Understand That Shit. I Love To Be Caressed, Held, Kissed, And All That Good Shit. But, Dudes Just Don't Seem To Be Into That Shit Anymore. That's Why I Want Someone That's Gonna Come Into My Life That's Gonna Give Me Those Things. Cuz, When I Had To Close Myself Off And Change How I Was To Be With Who I Was With. I Realized It Wasn't Worth It. I Felt Like I Couldn't Be Me Around Him Anymore. And I Missed That About Myself, As A Result I Lost Myself In All Of That. Shit, One Thing I Hate About Myself Is That I Catch Feelings Really Fast. But, It's Not Like That Anymore Cuz I Got My Guard Up Major. And People Think That I'm A Complete Bitch When I Give Advice, Cuz I'm Up Front And To The Point. Shit, People Say That It's Cuz I Don't Have A Man. At Least Not Yet Though. But Trust Me, I Know That Shit Ain't Even True. I Just Don't Let Niggaz Fuck Me Anymore. I've Grown Up, And Wised Up Now. But, Anyway Why Do I Feel That Way That I Do? When I Fall In Love, Am I Truely In Love? Or Do I Just Love The Idea Of Being In Love?

Jocking Niggaz

Is It Me? Or Are Niggaz Just Mean As Hell? I Just Had To Tell A Somewhat Homegirl Of Mine That The Dude That She Wants Doesn't Want Her. And She Started Crying Cuz She Really Wants To Be With Him. She's Like, "Well I Call Him, Leave Messages, And Email Him And He Won't Respond To Me At All. And I Don't Know What's Going On. In This Strange Turn Of Events She Says That She Has Asked Her Brother And Her Cousin For Advice. And It's Like They Didn't Want To Hurt Her Feelings. I Just Told Her The Truth Cuz They Wouldn't. I'm Like He Don't Want You So Move On With Your Life. There Are Too Many Fucking Niggaz In This World For You To Be Going Through This Bullshit. Niggaz Come And Go Every Mutha Fucking Day. You Better Wise The Fuck Up And Quickly. She Was Like,"Well, What If The Dude That You Are So Crazy About Doesn't Want You?" Well, I Was Like, "It Would Hurt, And I Would Be Hurt For A While But Then I Would Have To Move On With My Fucking Life. He May Be Fine And Everything But It Ain't Worth All This Shit. Cuz, I'm Not About To Sweat That Nigga, Shit Niggaz Sweat My Ass, Ya Feel Me. Chasing A Nigga Is Not In My Vocabulary Or In My Nature First Off. Believe Me When I Tell You It Ain't Worth What You're Going Through. Leave His Ass Alone And Don't Call His Bitch Ass For About A Week. And If He Don't Pay Attention To You Then Fuck It. Cry Two Tears In A Bucket, Fuck It. Cuz, If You Are On Your Grown Woman About Shit, And He Doesn't See You For The Real Woman That You Are Then That's His Goddamn, Fucking Loss Then. Fuck That Bitch Ass Nigga If He's Not Gonna Be Honest And Tell You How He Really Feels. Shit, At Least If He Don't Wanna Talk To You. He Could Tell Your Ass In An Email Though. But, That's Also Being A Punk Ass, Bitch Ass Nigga Cuz He's Not Telling You Face To Face, Or Being Straight To The Point. Cuz, He's A Wannabe Rapper, That Don't Make Him About Shit. Except Another Nigga With A Fucking Job, Trying To Act Fucking Bougie With His Shit. But, Like I Said Fuck That Nigga. It's All Good, Cuz You Will Find Somebody Special When It Comes Down To It. Niggaz Ain't Shit But Hoes And Tricks At The End Of The Day When You Think About It. It's Bullshit, Cuz He's Missing Out On Someone Special. But, Don't Niggaz Fucking Always. You Said That When He Comes Around You, Which Isn't That Much He's A Sweetheart. He Buys You Things, Treats You Good. But, When He's Not Around You He Treats You Like Shit. Guess What? He's Playing (CMC), Which Is The Game Called,"Cat, Mouse, And Confusion". Oh Hell Naw Like, I Said Their Are Too Many Niggaz In This World To Just Be Focusing On One In Life Man. If You Can't Get The Goddamn One You Want Find Another One. Cuz, I Know There Is A Fucking, Goddamn Me Shortage. But, Goddamn It Ain't The End Of The Fucking World. When Or If He Blows Up It's Gonna Be Worse Than This. So, Do You Really Wanna Fuck With His Triffling, Immature, Sorry Ass? Cuz, That's What He Is. I'm Not In A Relationship, Thank God. Cuz, Niggaz Ain't About Shit Nowadays. I Want A Real Man To Love Me, Make Me Happy, Show Me Things That I've Never Seen Before. You Know? I Went Through Trying To Keep The Nigga That I Was With And It Didn't Work At All. It Took Me A While To Realize That It Wasn't Gonna Work No Matter How Hard I Tried. So, Now I'm Alone. Hopefully, I'll Find The Right Man That Will Give Me Everything I Need And I Can Give The Same To Him In The Future. I Just Told Her To Fucking Forget His Wannabe Jay-Z Acting Ass And Move On With Her Life And Get Herself Together. There Will Be Other Niggaz, And Don't Play The Game Of "Cat, Mouse, And Confusion"...

Purity And Virginity

When Is It Too Young To Have Sex? A Girl Or Woman's Virginity Is Like The Most Sacred Thing That You Can Have In Life. Well, I'm Having A Slight Dilema With A Friend Of Mine's Lil Cousin. She's 14, Looks Like She's 21, Been With Her Boyfriend That's 18 For About 3 Months. And She Feels That She's Ready To Be Intimate With Him. And I Was Like WTF? Cuz, I Couldn't Understand Why In The Hell Is She Thinking About Sex At Her Age. We Both Talked To Her And Tried To Talk Her Out Of It. She Swears That She Loves Him, But I Truely Think That She Doesn't Know What The Blazing Hot Fuck Love Is. But, I Understand How She Feels Cuz She Has Friends That Are Older Than Her As Well. And Peer Pressure Is Kicking In. Her Emotions And Hormones Are All Over The Place Also. Two Of Her Friends Have Babies Already. And They Are 14, And 16. Her Relationship With Him Is Ok I Guess. But, The Age Difference Kind Of Concerns Me Though. I Truely Believe That She's In Deep Like When It Comes To Him. Like I Told Her, Once Your Virginty Is Gone There Is No Turning Back. You Are No Longer Pure In God, Or A Man's Eyes. Just Take Your Time. Wear A Purity Ring, Which She Does, Along With A Cross On The Same Chain. See, When I Found Out That She Was A Christian Girl That's When I Knew That She Needed "The Talk" From Us. And She Was Like, Well I'm Worried Cuz It's Goes Against God And My Morals. Plus, I'm Also Young But I Love Him. And I Told Her To Wait Cuz If He's Not Pressuring You. Shit, You Might Have A Good Guy. But, If He Is Pressuring You Fuck Him And Just Focus On Your Studies At School. Niggaz Will Always Be The Fuck Around, Just Waiting On Some Easy Ass To Come Through. Make Sure That You Guys Are On The Same Page Before Anything Pops Off. Shit, It Don't Need To Be Popping Off At Your Age Anyway Truely. And We Laughed About It. But, I Say Wait Til The Time Is Right For You. Make Sure You And The Nigga That You're With Respects You, And That He Can Wait Until You Are Ready. And That's The Most Important Thing At The End Of The Day...

Lines And Game

Alright. Let Me Tell Yall Females Something. Yall Can't Be Listening To These Young Ass Niggaz When It Comes To The Lines And Game That They Be Using. Come On Now Yall Need To Be Fucking Smarter Than That. By A Certain Age You Should Know That What All These Niggaz Be Saying To Yall Is A Bunch Of Goddamn Lies. These Niggaz Will Run Any Line Or Any Type Of Game That They Think Works For Them Just To Get Into Your Fucking Underwear. Trust Me When I Tell You Niggaz Are Only Out For One Thing, And That's Ass. And I'm Sure If You Give In To Them And Let Them Have The Ass. In The Long Run You Feel Like A Complete Ass Too. Niggaz Will Fuck You, Lie To You, And Play You Too. But, Only If You Let These Sorry Mutha Fucking Niggaz Do It To You. I Say If You Let Them Do It You Get What The Fuck You Deserve. Like I've Said Before Keep Your Head On Straight You Will Get Further. Don't Be Listening To This Tired, Lame Brain, Fucking Niggaz When It Comes To Their Tired, Fucked Up, Lines And Game. Cuz, When It Comes Down To It You Will Be Fucked In The End Listening To These Fucking Lying Ass Niggaz. Like The, I Love You, I Only Want You, And Let's Not Forget I Want You To Have My Baby Bullshit. Man, Get The Fuck Out Of Here With That Running Game Bullshit There. Cuz Guess What? They Always Tell You That If You Get Pregnant They Ain't Going Nowhere. If You Believe That Shit And They A Young Ass Nigga That Don't Know What They Fuck They Are Talking About. Then You Get What You Deserve Once Again And You Are A Crash Test Dummy. Cuz You Trusted Their Sorry Asses With That Lame Bullshit Called, Lines And Game. What A Crash Test Dummy Is: #1. A Female That Will Crash Cuz She'll Break Down From What He's Done To Her. The Test Part Is: #2. Cuz He Wants To Test Her Out And See What Type Of Woman She Is Even If She Is A Dumb Ass. And The The Dummy Part Is: #3. Cuz She Believed His Sorry Ass And His Lies That Roll With It. Niggaz Start Out With Their Lines And Game Very Young Nowadays. They Start Out Being Very Manipluative When They Are In Their Teen Years And Shit. And Then They Become Full Of Major Bullshit When They Become Men. Baby, They Get Worse In The Long Run But Only If You Ladies Let Them. Please, Let's Become Smarter And Not Fall For All The Lies And Game That All These Sorry Ass Niggaz, Which Are Boys And Men Feed To Us? Cuz In The Long Run Ladies All We Need Is Ourselves To Make It Through Life. Fuck It, Niggaz Add To Our Success And Happiness But They Do Not Make Our Lives Complete. We Are Already Complete They Just Add To What We Already Have And What We Already Are. And That's Happy Aren't We Ladies? So, Don't Fall For The Lines And Game And You Will Be Straight. Ya Feel Me... LMAO!